How to manage emotional triggers. What would a friend do?

How to manage emotional triggers, why am I here AGAIN, how many times will I have to go through this bullshit. How do we move forward…

ELD #40

Through some of the least enjoyable times, there was a moment that truly started to create some space between the suffering. That was the ability to be triggered and from that moment be compassionate and kind towards myself.

Vs the classic “fuck sake, why am I triggered again, this is bullshit I shouldn’t have to go through this.” Which creates 0 positive feedback loops.

However, changing that to “I love you, you got this” had a significant impact on my ability to then move forward and do things that would improve my overall wellbeing.

So the main point of this is a reminder to you, and myself, that when we get triggered emotionally or otherwise, can we use that as a signal to step into our most loving and most compassionate self to move forward.

Essentially this is like treating ourself like a friend. I mean thinking about it, if a friend came to us and was struggling / triggered, we wouldn’t be like “ohhh fuck sake, I’m here again, what a loser, I am actually useless…” We would actually be kind, create space for them to feel the shit, and the be compassionate and bring them back from being so triggered.

So would it not make sense to do that to ourself when we are that same way?

Consider this: You’re a boxer, and each time you get hit you over react and lose your temper because. Or the other way you can approach it would be to get hit, stay calm, and be methodical about your next moves. Which boxer is more likely to win?

I think it’s pretty obvious, the person who stays calm.

The boxer who has reached the point where they can get hit and keep cool has only gained this skill due to the exposure to being hit, experience and intention to improve.

Each time we’re triggered, it’s the same opportunity, to react with kindness and compassion to try and see the lessons. Or just repeat the same old “ohhh fuck sake, I’m here again, what a loser, I am actually useless…” whatever your version of that might be.

Triggered?

Perfect, another opportunity to get the reps in, which will one day lead to having little to no reaction. Boom, back to normal, onwards.

Triggered?

Fuck yeah, another chance to practice.

Triggered?

Good. As Jocko Willink would say.

Let’s reframe our triggers and see them as opportunities for growth!

Much love,

-Hunter

[Every Last Drop]

#ELD